Job Fair Fanatic T-Shirts

"Please, go ahead of me. I've got a better chance of getting the job, anyway."

'You say in your resume that you pay meticulous attention to detail...'

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

The Three Wise Queens

'We're looking for athletic people.'

Resume Dumpers

'Are you picky about preferring something with a livable wage?'

'We no longer call it 'hiring' - we now call it 'insourcing'.'

'Are all of these letters of recommendation from your mother?'

'How would you like to trade in our pork bellies pit?'

"I didn't get a job at the job fair, but I got a blue ribbon for best resume."

"I know you're a working dog, Angus. I just don't have anything for you right now."

Personnel,' Possible candidates'-'That'll be the day'.

"Under 'salary desired', could you be more specific than 'obscene'?"

Career counselor: 'If you want a great job, that won't be exported, get into politics.'

"That's not all I do. Actually I'm a psychological counselor- gymnast-motivational speaker-relaxation therapist-sex worker."

"It's a query from one of the applicants for the copywriters job asking 'wat was rong wiv his applicashun'?"

"A charming risk taker, who's not afraid to get bit. Boy, do I have an opportunity for you."

Job Fair: Programmers, Web Designers, Hackers.

"I really enjoyed reading your CV, professor. However, we can't hire you, because you suffer from defective media image."

Early career fair

I have an opening for someone like you. It's called a door.

Minnesota State Fair.

'So far, so good -- I got a second interview!'

"I like my job. It keeps me alive."

'One good thing about the salary - you won't be liable for income tax.'

'This is the worst resume I've ever seen!'

'You advertised for a responsible person. My employers say that whenever things go wrong, I'm always responsible.'

"Now tell me, what do you think you would bring to our company?"

"...I think you might be great for our management position."

'What have you been saying to him? He wants to be a careers master.'

"Yes, I do have a lot of management experience, but I won't be able to manage on the kind of salary you're offering!"

"The position you've applied for does employ some osmosis."

Bob was apprehensive about his new job, but excited about the new directions it coudl take him in...

'Define living wage...'