Jewelry Shop Owner T-Shirts

'They say gemstones have properties for relieving stress. . . once you get past the stress of paying for them.'

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

'Go ahead and laugh, but I lose my keys less frequently than you do.'

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."

"Happy Anniversary, dear! It's a gold spray-painted macaroni necklace."

'We recommend that you get a ring of equal weight for the other hand to prevent improper alignment of your spine.'

"See what I mean? It's going to take a bigger diamond."

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

Sale.

'Or you can rent by the week...'

'Ouwth! Bid my tong!'

"If there's any one lesson we've learned from the eighties, it's how to shop!"

'Good morning pumpkin.' 'Good morning treasure.' A pile of treasure saying 'good morning' to a pumpkin

'I want to finish with him, but I'll have to wait until he's made the final payment on my engagement ring.'

'I'll take it!'

'We would like to buy three rings... Engagement, wedding and teething!'

"Good artists borrow, great artists steal."

Bob thinks his new neighbor may be bad for business.

'It's one of our new technology rings, it allows you to download karats.'

'We always like to give more bling for the buck.'

Cow and Milk

'...And this one comes with a magnifying glass so she can show it off to her friends.'

Online Shopping.

Honesty in retail

Jewellers - "If you really love your wife to be, then money should be no object."

"Next time you meet me dressed as a giant boy, it's going to cost you a pair of diamond earrings."

Will you be mine?

'I think there's been some mistake...'

"How much did it cost to have your ears pierced?"

It was a good chance to get together and talk shop.

Woman uses an ATM with buttons for: Grocery, Leverage Buyout, Start Up Capital, Shop Till You Drop.

"Jewelry store, visit our ATM."