Jet-set Adventurer Pillows

"Please, Lord, make me T.S.A. precheck."

'And one more thing, while you're in Bangkok be careful of the ladies in Patpong district. They may not be all they appear to be.'

Airlines

"First class, or with children?"

"Business doesn't take a summer vacation."

Fighter Jet Sneeze

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

'Are we there yet?'

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

Travelling

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

"This seat with extra legroom is great."

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

Private Jet

'He must be going economy!'

'I'm sorry. I probably should have talked to to you before I took down our wedding photo and put up a picture of my jet.'

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

'Are we there yet! Are we there yet! Are we there yet!'

"'Mr. Evans,' she said to me with that adorable smile, 'I think you're the nicest boy in the entire old-boy network.'"

"We've waited twenty-five years to make this trip, and we're certainly not interested in getting there in any six and a half hours."

Two airplanes

"These shades are GREAT-I dreamt I was in Tahiti!"

'And don't be afraid to ask for directions.'

Flights and Coronavirus

'Will that be coach?'

Air travel isn't what it used to be.

"So far, my luggage has had a more exciting vacation than I have!"

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

Travel Agency: Pacific time cures all ills.

'Business or pleasure?'

"We are now boarding priority travellers. Please be ready to present an air of entitlement."

"Hell: The Airport"

"I know by outward standard I'm successful, but a voice inside my head keeps saying, 'Where's your private plane?"