Java Juggernaut T-Shirts

"It's only Tuesday?!"

"If you need something stronger we can bring out the defibrillator."

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

"...but the big question is, does the competition know that we don't know what we don't know?"

"Better than a business model, I have a business scheme."

Ninedency: A budding tendency

'Of course I put my kids first! Look at how much I pay the nanny!!'

The coffee's not working.

Although not felt by everone, Wanda's powrful jargon sent seismic shock waves through some of the more geologically unstable department in the organization.

"What did you think of the encryption article?"

Medieval headlines.

The Working Mum

"I'm afraid that due to a recent reorientation of forward facing customer resource functionality you're going to have to make the complaint to yourself... in triplicate."

Communication Breakdowns

"I tell you, it's a dog-eat-dog world out there!"

'Tragically, Mr. Cornwell was unable to afford a personal ethicist.'

'Harley manages our most aggressive growth fund.'

I'm sorry, but your drug screen results disqualify you as an employment candidate, You see, sample 'A' is a normal brain, sample 'B' is a normal brain on drugs, and sample 'C',,, Well, Mr, Dumpty, sample 'C' is your brain,

"I've given you a glowing reference, Hempson. And here's the disclaimer to go with it."

'I'm more unpopular now than I was at school.'

It's folks like Mildred who make collectibles collectable!

'I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home.'

"In a nutshell, my career goal is to nurture my unique personhood in a culturally diverse, progressive business environment, while also honoring the traditional values of back-stabbing, greed and global plundering!"

"I haven't been in any academic journals but I do get my Tweets re-Tweeted a lot."

'Finally some good news on the economy: four out of five economists agree that 80% if economists agree.'

Heyyy, don't worry about a thing. One more energy drink and I'll have you sliced and sutured in no time!

"In my downtime I'm using this app to learn Corporate speak, Legalese, and French."

IN OVER MY HEAD

Green Belt

"Great work, Smith. I must say, it's heartening to read a press release that both honors and builds upon the time-honored tradition of artisanal, hand-crafted gobbledygook!"

The Secret Formula in Coffee

"Impressive resume. But can you make coffee?"