Jar Enthusiast Pillows

'You don't need to worry Jean, he's a very simple cook.'

A European Nightjar in the form of a Jar

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

"Take this declaration of war and punch it up."

'Tarzan interviewing for a position as a corporate lawyer.' An interviewer asks, 'When we go against the gorillas, how can we be sure that you won't forget which side you're representing?'

The louder the kid, the tighter the lid.

'Thanks for being up support staff.'

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

'Forget it. Bioethics doesn't apply to us.'

"Oh, Oh, Oooohh!"

King and Jester

Lice outbreak at Jungle High (lion with a shaved head).

Jungle Games

"First I alienated the apes who'd raised me. Then there was a lot of turmoil with the colonials pulling out. Now Jane and me are semi-retired and I haven't swing through the trees in ages. Want a drink?"

Lion to safari man: 'I'm the king of the jungle and these are my official spokesmen.'

"Tarzan no want computer."

'...and cut the croc stories, I know you're just trying to make this dull trip exciting.'

tiger strangling snakes

Jane and Tarzan's wedding.

"Guilty of a sense of humor in a tight-ass world."

Traffic Jam

Jar Wars: 'Use the forks Luke... Use the forks!'

"You're right - organs do look more festive in these cute mason jars."

"Deal! I'll introduce you to Dian Fossey and you'll introduce me to Jane Goodall!"

'Don't worry, it's safe to come between us: He's not my kid...'

'We don't eat just anyone, ya know. You should feel honored.'

Law of the Jungle: Tarzan the Litigation Man.

'My wife used too much fabric softener.'

'Guess what, I got a job tallying bananas.'

'I'd love to help you guys, but I've got it pretty good here. I protect them and they throw me their sick and occasionally the odd jerk they want rid of.'

"With company-wide layoffs imminent I realized it was a matter of self-preservation."

Reality Bites

"I just want to get back into the swing of things."

School of Baristas

Rain forest: 'You are here - tomorrow you will be here'