Jacket Lover Gifts

"No one leaves until we reach a consensus on whether it's black or navy."

Sales are Patchy

"Sorry, Ma'am. Down only."

"It's a midriff warmer."

Badge, Goodge, Indifferentge.

Wind Breakers.

'I wouldn't say this wine's name is long, but it's continued on the bottle next to it.'

Let's get organized

'I know one of my shoulders is lower than the other. It's because my father's guiding hand is always on that shoulder.'

Parade of Businessmen

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"By labeling it, I control it."

Electric Blanket.

Just because I'm adapted to the cold, doesn't mean I like it!

"To be fair, I think you should be very clear about the ground rules with your next jester."

'For my latest line, I bought clothes at Target and then changed the label,'

Philosopher's pub with 24 hour thinking.

'Does this suit make me look too eager?'

Fat happy businessman with a euro coin printed on his chest

Velvety. And so was the wine.

'...And an extra packet of crackers! It's our Anniversary!'

It bag and no knickers!

A tailor measuring a jacket.

'Hey! This box of 'made in America' stickers has a sticker on it that says 'made in Taiwan'.'

"...This is the only way I can get though college!"

Builders fashion range

'I often tried wearing my pants like that, but I always ended up forming other letters.'

Baby sucks cork on Australian's bush hat.

Men see an old lady in a round hat from the back and think she is a pretty young lady.

STRIP "I've tried everywhere to get a new winter court...but all the stores are full of next years summer collections"

Time to put away your presents. I don't have room. You said you "needed" a new jacket. I do! My old one's too small. Donate it. I would. But I can't get it out of my closet.

"We have every visible wavelength in stock. What color would you like to filter out?"

Try not to hog all the blankets tonight.

"If my mother and father had wanted to see Yves Saint Laurent's initials on my possessions, one supposes they would have named me Yves Saint Laurent."

'Ruddy european labelling legislation'