Jack Of All Trades T-Shirts

'I see from your CV you're all things to all men.'

Man blows up balloon and head explodes.

"Citizen of the World, Wine Connoisseur, Husband. I may be spreading myself too thin."

Jack of all trades

'Even polymaths, Rodney, have to choose a major.'

'McWit Plumbing and Lite Puff Pastries.' The only way to survive in today's economy it's good to diversify.'

Remote control pirate bully

"Unfortunately Daddy already owes the government about 500,000 Pokemon cards."

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

"I just reached 1000 jumps."

Philosopher trading cards.

December 26 - Vegas, office (post) Christmas party.

Work Life Balance.

'Allow me. After all, I'm planning to be an electrician.'

Blackjack: free lemonade!

Executive sitting behind desk with one box labelled 'Bid' and the other box labelled 'Ask'.

'The only way to survive in the current economy is to diversify.'

"I'll be out in the great world, wearing may hats."

'I've decided to sell before the market goes stale.'

"I can't even deal."

'The packet says 'do not climb without safety harness'.'

Hit me.

"When you're done here can you look at my laptop?"

OK, buy! No, wait... sell! No, change that... sell! No... buy! No... sell! Buy!

'Stocks rose on news of a proposal to have greed' dropped from the seven cardinal sins.'

'Something about this doesn't seem right--we found the king, face down, in the river.'

'Stocks rebounded from yesterday's losses on news that 'it aint over till it's over'.'

'These are my rookie cards.'

Blackjack Shuffle

'I have a hunch the dealer's gonna bust. I'm taking a card.'

'I'll trade my 12 million dollar player for three of your 4 million dollar players.'

'...And stop calling me the 'Mother of all Mothers'!'

"Want to trade banks with me?"

"I'm making a candlewick spread, so how do I get the wicks out?"

"Frankly. I find the term 'lumbersexual' to be offensive. I prefer the term 'timber dick.'"