Ironists Of Commercialism Pillows

"It starts earlier every year."

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

'Caution Speed Bump Ahead.'

"Pavlov's dog: Friday night"

Why Superman flies himself

I know it seems a bit misplaced, but it does pay all the wedding expenses !'

That private little woodland walk you used to love now with a: Visitors' Experience Centre!

Privatized Jails

"Can you give me your opinion on the 'Paid for' magazines debate?" "Sure...but it will cost you"

'Oh, the guru is up on the next peak -- I'm his agent.'

"Our constantant surveillance indicates workers are becoming more paranoid."

"Halloween stuff already? It's August!"

'They didn't kick me upstairs after all -- they threw me down the elevator shaft!'

"I'm going out on a limb here, and sincerely apologize to my constituents today for the misappropriations and bribes I will take if I'm elected governor."

"It must be near New Year's Day...There are Easter eggs in the shop windows!"

Clancy: Extending Overdrafts

'Office of P.G.Barley and Clones'

Mall Ahead - Be prepared to shop.

"My only hope is that future generations honor this day of independence with a huge one-day sale."

Fancy Wallpaper in a Cell

'We're all gonna have lovely hangovers in the morning!'

'I stole it from the library.'

"Up here! Beef jerky, trail mix, energy bars!"

Unbeknown to other, Thoreau would sometimes, in the middle of the night, sneak out for a few odds and ends.

'I spend the winter in Sarasota now, since I sold my entire list to telemarketers.'

'I'm sick of you leeching off me.'

'Rest assured, your fear of harpoons is anything but irrational.'

"If we new this was going to happen we could have arranged some great TV sponsorship deals."

"Honey, guess what? My therapist finally got me to cry!"

General says, 'Gentlemen, no more war. Because of health concerns they've recalled everything that contains lead, like our bullets.'