Economic Ironist Pillows

Man stands outside investment bank holding sign: 'Will work for huge bonuses.'

Sen. Krupt. I don't tell constituents that we're fueling inflation. I say we're protecting consumers and thanks to us they won't have to worry about buying any cheap stuff.

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

It's a new government directive requiring us to be 58% more cheerful within 18 months.

"Originally I wanted to be a stockbroker but found I fainted at the sight of money.''

'For the economy to improve we're counting on a 'trickle down' from the super-wealthy to the wealthy.'

"Our constantant surveillance indicates workers are becoming more paranoid."

'As long as the gov't has a printing press, all deposits federally insured.'

"We're making progress."

This isn't a good time to see him --- He just got outbid for a soul on eBay. Beelzebub.

"Who the hell is responsible for this no-blame culture???"

"Willis has kindly agreed to sum up our current financial position."

Sartre's E-Mail

"So the only way to save the economy is to spend what we haven't got - plus ca change - moin ca change!"

VEGETATE.

"It's a bill."

'You don't know how lucky you are. My mortgage is worth more than my house.'

"Regarding earnings guidance, as my mother used to say: 'If you can't say something nice, don't say anything'. I'll be shutting up now."

'Who's the wise guy?'

Income Tax Return

"You're operation went smoothly, but we're very concerned about some post-surgical insurance complications."

"Such a shame when he was THIS close to emptying his inbox!"

"Senior management is happy for us to manage the changes ourselves apart from a couple of things."

"He's all the stimulus I need."

'We can't increase taxes on the rich - the rich are the ones who made America what it is today - and you only hope...someday...'

"Oh, you know, I'm just a typical guy in a boring suit, working in the corporate industry."

"We're moving you to another office, Norman."

"I'm selling all my old passwords that were stolen."

First Church of Fiscal Morality: The Meek Shall Inherit The National Debt!

'Would it be possible to fire last year's 40,000 employees a second time?'

'Help! As a contrarian I invested in rotary and supersized phones.'

'Is it okay to put my credit card payment on my credit card?'

'What about if we give our major stockholders samples of our antidepressants?'

'You're fine, but I don't like the looks of your health insurance.'

'I wish you had the fortitude that the government has. Being in debt doesn't stop THEM from spending!'