Ironically Named Giant Appreciators Gifts

'OK, what's the first thing we need to capture in our Job Safety Analysis?' 'Don't tick off TINY!'

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

'Projectile painting.'

"Sorry, the sound of your chewing sends me into a rage."

65 Million Years Ago

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

"Here's something called "The Fifty Greatest Countdown Shows Ever!""

Joined at the hipster.

'Does it bother anyone else that our entire business is based on one questionable product?'

Now that we've developed lungs, it's only a matter of time before we feel guilty about not exercising.

Caution (arrow falling from sky sign)

Finally! A cure for the common cold!

Wine taster with mineral water

'GM apples prevent Migraine'

'Even in the mundane tasks, aim for perfection!'

Boss to employee: 'I'm downsizing your paycheck.'

"Why can't you be more like little Hester Prynne? She's getting straight A's."

"I eat a totally plant-based diet and I still can't lose weight."

"I'll never understand it. I followed the generally accepted principles of embezzling."

'Even down here we never lose our sense of humor!'

"No thanks. I'm not interested in any handouts."

"Bit big for a cherub, isn't it, Brother Ignatious?"

"Is your dog friendly?"

'So who's smoking?'

"I like to stay on top of things."

"Let's see, this one is cherry flavored, I think this one is blueberry ..."

"We've decided to give you a bonus, Rick. It's any change you find under the cushions."

'Are you free at the moment?'

Big business is not evil

We pay the maximum minimum wage.

Einstein's T-Shirt Reads: I'm with Stupid (Arrows point everywhere).

"Can you believe those guys? We tell them absolutely, positively no further negotiations, and they stop negotiating!"

We're so pleased with your twenty years work, we've decided to offer you a two year short term contract.

Sugar Crunchies - Free Dental Treatment.