Ironically Connected Friends T-Shirts

"We talk all the time."

'I bought him to retrieve my e-mails.'

"The difference between us and them is...they can be reproduced by unskilled labour."

'Who else have I written for? Ridge Park Avenue, 7th Street, Elm Road, Thornwood Drive...'

"Mr. Sherman, you hired our team of management consultants to stremline your enterprise, and that is precisely what we are doing."

'Children's Personals'

"Holly and Michael were growing envious of their son's imaginary friend… Rickey and me are going to the Knicks game with Bruce Springsteen!"

Arabian Nights.

'I didn't spend $49.95 on this answering machine to have you just hang up so leave a message!'

Robinia Floribunda

"It was all that running around town buying diet books that achieved my weight loss."

'Yes, I was very popular as a child. I had lots of imaginary friends.'

'Remember our pillow-talk session, Morton, when you said 'the risk of rejection gives love it's existential edge'?'

'We've got the neighbours from hell.'

Flowers Explosion!

"My goodness, Albert! Open your eyes and watch out where you're going while grazing!"

"I never appreciated having a cat until I lost my hair."

'You do realize that's just a giant novelty fork, right? They used to have one in the restaurant where I worked.'

"Hey, where's Frank?"

"So now I guess I'll have to meet your friends."

"Can I call you back, Rusty, I'm in the jacuzzi."

'If Larry didn't stay in touch with his imaginary childhood friends, he wouldn't have any clients at all.'

Finding common ground.

"Talk for all of eternity, just $29 a month."

"My cellphone needs charging. Do you mind if I unplug your life support?"

"Look, Wendy....our pets are playing together!"

"It didn't work -- My imaginary playmate refused to take the rap."

'His imaginary playmate got sent to juvie.'

Honey, hurry up, the baby-sitter's here...

'I was just about to ask you to sit on my lap!'

'The only thing wrong with you, Tom, is that you're almost too good to be true.'

"That's Jake, Bethany, Stuart, and at the end their imaginary dad."

'Well! Well! Talk of the Devil.....'