Ironic Juxtapositions Lover T-Shirts

Crackpot watches while women catfight.

"I'd kill for a fresh fruit fritter."

Meanwhile, in Florida: Little Free Library/Little Free Firearms

'Tomorrow we'll look back on this as a night to remember.'

Welcome Association of Stage Builders.

"Yaffle: For the funny bone in you"

'Yes, the colours are wonderful. But he only does five pages per month, and he doesn't support PostScript.'

Devil tattoo.

"I can check again, but Mr. Saunders usually insists on the full wait."

Nicolas Maduro

Special Place in Hell...

Fastest gun on the Silk Road

Book Shop: The great American Novel and The great American tweet.

A Heavy Metal Musician.

"These should help me approach your father on his own level."

"It's not you, Glen—it's your ex-wife. She's behind me, isn't she?"

Acupunture Clinic opens next to a Ballon Animal shop.

"I've got nothing on for the next few months, do you fancy sex?"

"You've always let me down in this marriage."

"Well, ya gotta go when ya gotta go."

"Nah, not my type."

"Well, Henderson, you were the one who thought we should give him a free hand."

Smokin' In the Toys Room

Divorcees Club - The Joy of Ex.

'Know your future - palmistry, tarot cards, DNA screening'

'I think we should start seeing other people.'

"Microsoft up a third, GM down a half on low volume..."

"We're finishing up the sales reports now."

"Your honor. I have just three questions for Ms. Fairy about her scam. One. Why just baby teeth? Why not dentures?...."

'I hate it when you beg.'

"You cheeky little monkey, Stephen, trying to pinch a chip."

"Next song's called Dirt-poor Boxcar Man which I wrote partly in the VIP lounge at JFK in my private limo on the way here tonight."

'I'll never forgive him for having my charge cards wrapped up in his body cast!'

'Eating my husband did give me a small bit of consolation for the prenup Hell he put me through.'

Divorce proceedings: "And do you, Ann Mary Thomas, agree to take it and shove it?"