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'Yes it is lonely at the top, now get out of my office!'

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Knight Golfing

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

"We're at the top of the food chain and rulers of all we survey. What could possibly go wrong?"

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

"He's his own worst enemy."

'Gerry just can't seem to relax on holiday.'

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"Just don’t tell the other vultures. I’ll never hear the end of it."

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

The Frog Prince

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

"Messenger, dost thou bring me good news or dost thou bring me bad news?"

"I'm afraid he left everything to charity... Oh, I see. I take it your name's Charity?"

Princess Anne

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

"If it's got my ass on it, it's befitting of royalty."

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

Jester Surgeon

'No, you can't play poker tonight! The last time you played, you lost Schewig-Holstein!'

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'

Stone Age women were less happy than men at the arrival of the iron age: Look what I've invented just for you darling.

Caution: ironic literal proverb ahead (fork in the road)

'And then, just to humor the guy I said 'I need a hug', little thinking that the big gorilla would do just that.'

'Don't worry it's organic...'

"Here comes the quote unquote dog whisperer."

"Nevermore."

Ted often though back to those good old days when he was king of just the jungle.

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."