Iron Supplement Skeptic Pillows

'I can't believe this! You're low in iron.'

"How long have you lived in this gym?"

'Well, this is a first †he's got repetitive motion syndrome from eating!'

Fishing rod coming out of a health farm towards a hot dog stand.

Man sees hug capsules: 'Not to be taken Orally.'

'Too much Omega 3.'

Now all meals contain 'Enzymate' for fast digestion.'

Eureka! This has telemarketing sale of a diet supplement written all over it.

'First of all, I'm taking you off the iron supplements.'

'Extreme acupuncture.'

Toilet roll beauty tips.

"Management would like you to keep in mind that the latest research indicates that everything on our 'Healthy Menu' is now unhealthy."

'I see the truth-in-advertising-people got wind of the proposed privatising...'

'We don't have a health plan but our accountant knows Reiki.'

Energy Drinks

'According to the voice-stress analyzer, he's not going to lower taxes.'

'Another upsetting discovery from the world of nutrition: New studies indicate that the air itself is fattening...'

Forget Your Worries at Velton Corners, Spa.

'...I expected a little more than... a sticky toffee with fluff on it.'

'You're taking too much of that clamshell calcium, Margaret.'

"Do you have anything that looks vegan, but is made from meat?"

Studies show some foods work miracles/study says studies are a crock.

"It's extremely rare for anyone to suffer side effects from health supplements Mr Baxter. Just how much cod liver oil have you been taking?"

'It says right here, sir, three times as much iron as other supplements.'

"These diet pills must work. My purse is getting thinner and thinner."

Super and Super Duper Vitamins.

"Would you believe it, that pensions liberation plan was just an on-line scam..."

"Our dental plan is fluoridation of the water cooler."

Smart drugs. 'Gee, duh, I don't know. Does it look like we have any in stock?'

"Full disclosure: I served five years for bank fraud."

"My new health plan only allows in network complaining."

"We at pharmacorp are 100% behind the benefits of 'physical and artistic' therapies which is why we've developed 'megazylomol' to enhance the experience!"

'How is it health food prices always make me feel sick as a parrot?'

'Years ago he got his investment back, plus millions in interest. So he's leaving everything to Bernard Madoff.'

RIP Retirement In Peace