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"I stole me a pot of gold. That's how I became a Lepre-CON."

'Gee, Patrick, Ireland must be a dank dreary place without serpents,'

St. Patrick's Day trivia

'Banished? Well this is the first I've heard!'

"I guess I'm more of a why-wolf."

'It's a note...It says I.O.U. one pot of gold.'

A vampire in a canoe.

"... And this one needs a shot of vodka."

"I don't care what you thought you saw,l there are no such things as people"

"Oh, this? Crazy story..."

"He never passes by without a mischievous smile."

Astronaut finds used firework on the moon.

'What? You used a Welshman? The recipe specifically calls for a scot!'

Grimm's Fairytales - The Turnip; Student Tricked into 'Sack of Knowledge'

"It appears to be a giant boil, sire."

"Which one is yours?"

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

Mephistopheles

Folk o' the Wee

A were-cow.

Robin Hoods' Band. Member Auditions Today. Happy, Sleepy, Grumpy, Sneezy and Dopey are all fine qualities. But I'm leaning more towards "Merry".

'What does the tooth fairy do with all those teeth?'

'Look I know they're all the same length, but concentrate, Mrs. O'Brien. Which one of these fools took your husband?'

W. B. Yeats

Hansel meets his biological mother.

'Face it, William - you're shit at it!'

"No squirrel, but I found Jimmy Hoffa."

Loch Ness Monster

Leeches, lucky charms, rat catching. The secretary of health is in.

The day that William Tell bought his first crossbow.

William Tell Overture

"'Frankenstein' is Jewish. I'm Irish on my mother's side because she was green, and an 'O' Houligan'..."

Dutch boy fills pool with water from dike.

'I'm playing St. Patrick in the school play. I need a miter and ten thousand snakes by Friday.'

"I want to thank all the little people."