Investment Professionals T-Shirts

'Down here, greed is totally unregulated.'

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

In the Guru District

Entering the Business Community: Assets/Liabilities

"What's a debenture?"

Build Your Own Portfolio

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

'If you're so smart, why don't you have some Index Funds in your portfolio?'

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

Investments - remember, you are what you invest in!

'Let's just wait here until the federal stimulus returns.'

The economy.

E.U. Banking Union.

'Now that we've defined 'happy deficits' let's try it out on the stockholders.'

Thanks to the financial business scientists know it for sure now - Black Holes really exist!

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

European currency on the edge.

Economic Outlook Conference - 'Remember the seating is optimist, pessimist, optimist,...'

America's Funniest Interest Rate Hikes

'... And this is Goldsmith, our futures consultant.'

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

"You called me, boss?" "Yes, I overheard you talking to patrons about all the new planets we’ve found." "I want you to stop doing that." "At least until I’m done buying up as much of that real estate as I can. I don’t need any competitors driving up the prices." "Very bad man." "When the hipsters run out of cities to gentrify here, my properties on Gliese 581c are going to make a killing."

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

"I can remember when having a '212' phone number still meant something in this world."

'Remember, an economic boom is usually followed by an economic kaboom,'

'In a surprise move, Greece decided to peg its currency against the Baklava.'

"Cheer up, if this carries on we could become a very attractive takeover target.

'My interpretation is that it deals with the artist's utter frustration over the scarcity of remaining, reasonable equity values.'

'Oh, no! It's all in euros!'

"This is the World Bank? Somehow, I had pictured it differently."

'Stand back! All he needs is an injection of long-term capital.'

Early Attempt at Quantitative Easing.

Historic Bank Jobs.