Interview Insight Seekers Pillows

Methuselah attends a job interview.

I sometimes feel spotted, but I never really feel seen.

Don Quixote is Caged (Don Quixote).

"I could catch a bicyclist, well maybe not a bicyclist, but I could catch a jogger, definitely."

"My first night in the lab and I was clearly the smallest brain in the place."

"All the celebrities come here."

"I'd like to be a shake-it-off kind of person, but I'm more of a cling-to-it-and-focus-on-it-until-it's-irrevocably-weaved-into-my-psyche sort of gal."

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

Resume Dumpers

'Have you tried removing the blindfold?'

'During the next commercial, I'd like to talk to you about your childhood.'

"Now, let’s talk about your attachment issues."

"I didn't bring a resume. I brought coffee and donuts."

'I see an applicant being hired!'

Our large economy size packet hasn't been selling...it's too big to carry home.

"To listen to your instincts, press one."

Being unable to clearly articulate responses to interview questions is a common mistake...

How are you feeling, Al? I couldn't be happier, Dr. Kapuchnik. Gee, that's great. No, I mean I wanted to be happier, but I couldn't.

'My resume,...in rap form!'

"...And in the dream, I was angry at my mother, so I told her she never gave me the love I needed... What do you think it means?"

Analyst and patient

"Are you blushing?!"

Where the hell did you get that brain ?

'Let me start by saying I wish I had your imagination...'

'My next song is a little ditty about why I don't have any references,'

'I've had tight deadlines, if that's what you mean by performing well under pressure.'

Hypatia

"Anyone having a 'Eureka!' moment?"

ME, MEDITATING ON NO-SELF

'Human resources gave us the idea of trying 'blind interviewing'...'

We're trying a new interview technique. It's called "laddering".

An epiphany is the sudden realization of essential meaning. An "explanation point"!

'Niche apres tenure. Niche before and you're toast.'

Opening arguments would begin after the intimidation round.

'My name is John and I haven't had a think for 36 days.'