Interpersonal Explorer Pillows

"It says women sleep a half hour a night longer than men."

The world of interpersonal relationships was dealt a blow today when John Gray, author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, finally came out of the closet. In other news...

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Club Antisocial

Woman and pets with hair sticking straight up all enter Stress Management Clinic.

'Charlie is the first to admit that he's too old for me.'

'My understanding of psychiatry is that women fantasiss and men internalise - in fact I'd like to internalise right now.'

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

Relationship Warning Lights

"I feel we haven't moved beyond parallel play."

"Why don't you find a museum!"

"The Langmore Regional High School Inner Debate Team"

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

Tunnel of Love/Tunnel of Marriage

"If you let down your guard, I'll walk over the moat."

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

"Is this Randy the Love Doctor?"

Large Emoticon Collider

Battle of the sexes in a relationship

'When we first met there was a chemistry between us. These days though, it's more of a 'chemistry set'.'

"I'm so glad we enjoy the same style foreplay."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"He gets easily abstracted."

"You never told me your dad was so delightfully old-fashioned."

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

The Map of the Human Heart

'Am I looking sad or happy in the appropriate places?'

'I'm sick and tired of your mood swings, Frank!'

"Just what emotion is your emotional support dog supporting?"

'We're out of earshot now, so you can drop the phoney, Oxbridge accent.'

"There's something I have to tell you."

"I appreciate the support. It feels good to finally get that off my chest."

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

'Trust me, she can't fail to notice you now...'