Interpersonal Analyst Pillows

"I can't tell if I'm being overly sensitive or you're being a cold, controlling, maniacal jerk."

"No way. Lando, my friend. Lando." "There's no way Lando Calrissian was a better betrayer than Alex Krycek." "Ask any passerby on the street. 9 out of 10 of them won't even know who Alex Krycek is." "That's utter foolishness. Everyone knows Alex Krycek. He was basically the X-Files' anti-Mulder. He could out-weasel Billy D. Williams any day." "Stop!" "When men start arguing over which fictional character was a better betrayer, they have officially run out of things to talk about." "That Kr

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

"I may be obsessive and I may be compulsive, but no way am I obsessive compulsive."

"Men can keep a secret, but it takes a woman to tell them that it was supposed to be a secret!"

Awkward First Dates

"It's nothing, go back to sleep. I was just getting a DNA sample."

Sharing the Bed with Zeno

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

Relationships.

'At last, the newly discovered films of Woody Alien.'

I asked my girlfriend if there was someone else...

"I'm ready to go whenever you're through fussing with tablescapes."

"Oh darling! I just got your wonderful value added proposition! Of course I'll marry you!"

"I've had you appraised."

"Remember that lovely couple of scarlet macaws we met in Puerto Jiménez? They split up!"

"I used to know my wife's fondest dreams and desires, but now I leave that to Google."

"She's got money and he's a 'poet'."

"I miss the way it was when I thought you knew everything."

"I don't love you anymore, Barry, but I still think you're a great American."

'And that, in a nutshell, is why men don't understand women.'

'Listen, Geoffrey ...I know you're a clinical psychologist, but I DON'T have A.D.D. ! You're just incredibly boring.'

"I need a more interactive you."

"You can't let the tick birds continue to define you."

"With Harry all options are on the table, including pointlessly looking for a job that doesn't exist for him anymore."

'So, when did you first realise that you fancied me rotten?'

"Be open about what's bothering you...."

"Don't even think about it."

"Are you uncomfortable discussing this because I'm a man or because I'm your husband?"

"Will you sign a legally binding contract to get the state involved if you ever decide to leave me?"

"Mort, I'm writing a case study about two diametrically opposed archetypes of your generation. Archetype number one: a bold, debonaire male... The type that suffered no fools, lived life to the fullest, and pursued romance with tough, smart 'dames' who kept him on his toes. And then there's archetype number two: weak, insecure, afraid of life, and dominated by overbearing romantic partners who brought him to his knees. Ok. I'll participate. Who'd you find for archetype #2? You might want to

"According to the statistics in this article, you should be my ex-husband and be three months behind in alimony payments."