Internet Privacy Advocate Pillows

"It's 'She's driving me crazy and I'm not sure whom to turn to.' "

'Don't act too adorable...we'll be half naked on the internet before we even know what privacy is!'

"All ok. Wait, let's see what google remembers..."

"Pssst! Wanna buy back your browser history?"

"Clean your browser history, mate?"

The Anti-Agent

"Too crowded. Let's go."

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

The Circular Logic of Fascism

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

"Before I do this, I would ask everyone to please delete the footage in the event of this not going as planned."

Next gen pregnancy tests.

Statue of Liberty with satellite dish and laptop spying on the World.

"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."

"You work well without supervision? Fat chance of that happening in here!"

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

Police Statetion

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

"I've added an additional response to the doc's health questionnaire. It's called 'Mind Your Own Business.'"

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

"Yes, I'm alone."

'Boy, being an endangered species is quite hard: I get weighed, tagged, filmed, recorded and studied by scientists: I have no privacy...'

"With the baby-cam, there is no privacy."

CCTV in church.

"Turn on the news." "I will not comply." "My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story." "There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on rocky road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills." "Who told you this?" "Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy."

The Best Defense

Privacy

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

"We've updated our privacy policy...it's so private we can't even tell you."

We've already got one. A hidden microphone in the staff coffee area.