International Business Gifts

'I don't call expanding to New Jersey thinking globally.'

I think the reason our international unit is performing poorly is because our mission statement says, 'Think locally and act locally'.'

"You're looking for an international expert? I'm your man! My computer is from China, the desk is from Romania and my clothes are made in Bangladesh!"

"Manufacturing will take place in China, R&D in South Korea, logistics in Mumbai and we'll be running customer care in Vietnam."

'We've decided to foreclose on Paraguay, Ferguson -- Get down there and take the place over.'

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"In Japan, workers bow to their boss, but I've found that an enthusiastic round of applause will suffice here."

"We'll ask China to come to the party."

Welcome to China, Sir Businessman!

Albanian Customs

Ever Given

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"Looks like we found the issue."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

No, I didn't know they were going to cut the office furniture budget in half.

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"Is this to make me feel bad for not getting you that laptop?"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

'Now that I have your attention...'

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"