Interior Design Daredevil Pillows

"I liked the couch better where it was."

Armchair on Stilts

'Smith, we need more creativity. You have to learn to think outside the box.'

"Don't tell me... you hired a professional decorator!"

'Now it fits.'

"The painting and pillows were his idea. The scratches were mine."

'You had to put a skylight in didn't you?'

'OK, the worn out carpeting proves I snack too much. Only one thing to do. Tomorrow I get prices on hardwood floors.'

Clown couple in bed with wavy mirror above their bed.

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

A Bedroom In The Middle Of Being Redecorated.

Fred's not sure who to call first: 911 or the plumber he should have called in the first place.

"I'm tired of this cave. I want a condo!"

No one ever discovered Mad Jake's secret: he was taking a correspondence course in interior decoration.

Super glue . . .

"You've done an absolutely fabulous job with the house, Anne, and Gordon's so improved!"

Man who has called of his engagement because his fiancée did not match his furniture.

"Wow . . . We could really fill this room with uncomfortable silences."

"I love what you've done to the place."

"Be honest...did you actually get any paint on the living room walls?"

Open-Plan Psychiatry

It's nice, but we were hoping for something unfurnished.

"Just imagine this room fully carpeted with multi-level platforms and cubbies."

Wallpapering 3

Builder follows an architect's blueprints exactly, including the smudges.

"I told you that TV would be too big for this room."

"The current owners removed a number of walls and used soft, neutral tones to create a very spacious, open concept."

"This is a great little vase! and now it makes me thing we should redo the living room."

"Is this the first time you've put wallpaper up?"

'Wait, put that back where it was. Let's see how the scratching post looks in this corner.'

"It may not be the hardwood floor we were hoping for, but it's SO much better than that hideous carpeting!"

"Yes, I did say I wanted a TV mounted on the wall. But, I was referring to a new, light flat screen."

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Housekeeping - No. VII

Man defaces a painting to make it fit above his fireplace.

"My decorating style is more like 'Flung Shui'."