Interior Decor Diva Pillows

'Be reasonable, dear - I'm sure Mrs West didn't mean to clash with your new curtains.'

'I didn't get to do any clothes shopping. It took me forever to pick out our new living room furniture.'

'Oh, do you mind taking your shoes off - New carpet and don't use the toilet - new and we're eating out- new kitchen...'

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

Politicians' basements (as seen on TV)

"Home depot."

Use your imagination.

"Careful with that - the wife made it at pottery class."

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

"I think I perferred the plain magnolia"

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

"You're welcome."

'Come on, you can help me to choose some lovely wallpaper.'

'Is there any chance at all I could get you to stop leaving your pantyhouse laying around?!'

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

"Too bright."

'I had no idea Ikea had been around so long.'

"The painting and pillows were his idea. The scratches were mine."

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

Framed Lady

The Tectonics and Their Plates.

"And this is a $20,000 ‘meditation room’ — can you believe it?!!"

"Could we be getting a little too museum-quality?"

"It's too late for Jim. The tchotchkes have him now."

Olly really didn't know his arse from his elbow.

New Coat of Paint at the Sistine Condos

"Memo to self - personalise new work-station."

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.