Interior Decor Aficionado Mugs

"As them if I can have the bottle when it's empty - it'll make a really nice table lamp."

"The artist-in-residence is struggling a bit, but other than that we're fine."

The dark side of computer-aided design.

Carpet fitting at New Year's Day. 'Out with the old, in with the new'.

'Are we indoors or outdoors?'

Cavemen Printing Animal Art

"Hal said he had big dreams...so he bought this bed."

"Ghah! I hung the new mirror upside down!"

"I can't believe they don't sell toilets!"

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

"I may not know much about art, but I do know what's suitable for framing."

"The knights of the round accent table"

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

Fittd shēt

Cat statues on entrance gate

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

"If it's got my ass on it, it's befitting of royalty."

Waiting Room Quarterly

"How much?! Blimey, to get my money's worth, I'd need to use it EVERY WEEK!"

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

Lay-Z-Family Recliner

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

'Welcome to the house warming! The map points out what is furniture and what is sculpture.'

Unknowingly, with one swish of his blood soaked mammoth tail he was inflicting pain and suffering on billions of unborn people. Home decorating had been invented.

"Well, your feng shui isn't my feng shui."