Interest Rates Gifts

'My accounts aren't insured, but it's the risk I take for higher interest rates.'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

'I think I must be ambidextrous. I can calculate interest with both sides of my brain.'

'Honestly Bob, it's not that bad. If you can make as much next year as you did this year you'll be able to pay off your outstanding taxes for last year. That'll just leave the interest, the tax for this year and... my fees.'

Born to raise interest rates.

"The interest rate can't go any lower, so if necessary, we'll have to go back to pounds of flesh."

"Oh, him? He's the guy who changes the interest rate when it's set by the fed."

'We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate.'

'Are you good with decimals? Our certificate of deposit is currently paying 0.025%.'

'Of course we have to learn decimals. How else will we be able to compare bank interest rates.'

"And please let Alan Greenspan accept the things he cannot change, give him the courage to change the things he can and the wisdom to know the difference."

Making borrowing easier

Finance Co., Refinance Co.

'There's no interest on your purchase for a year. Then we become VERY interested in your balance after that.'

"Don't forget — it's good to give, but even better to get back."

Bank of England Base Rates.

"According to my actuary tables, your loan will outlive you."

Devil-may-care loans.

"I'm here to pay off the last loan installment!"

'Here's a hundred bucks -- now, you give me $101.37.'

The End of Economic Stimulus is Near!

'I'd think that after a $800 billion bailout, you could do better than 1.2% for 11 months.'

Bankers waking up from cryo-sleep to explain the Fed's interest rate hike to you.

"If a higher interest rate is a sign of a stronger economy, you must think I'm golden."

"I don't know a damn thing about monetary policy,but I know what I like."

"We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate."

"Your money was working for you, but it suddenly quit and now it's working for me!"

"Is that a fixed-rate scowl or is it adjustable to the current interest rate?"

"Must you do that every time I say interest rates are bound to rise?"

'What's your not-quite-so prime rate?'

"Well Wendy, results were mixed this week - interest rates edged up, while hte lowest common denominator was down. Again."

Person feeding hungry 'Residential real estate market' with 'Low interest rates' and 'Jobs'

'Usury' is not a pretty word, Mr. Williams.