Insurance Salesman Pillows

'On the contrary, I think this is the BEST time to talk about life insurance.'

"......And finally I'd like to thank my 5 brothers, 4 sisters, 3 uncles, 2 aunts, 23 nephews and nieces and 37 cousins."

"No, Mrs. Johnson, in life insurance we don't have a policy that provides for the 'full replacement value' for your husband."

'And the beauty part is you can be your own beneficiary for the first eight times.'

'Remember, your fire insurance is only good if your house burns down...melting doesn't count.'

'Dad, do you really think trying to sell me life insurance counts as quality time?'

Acts of God

"The joke is on us. We thought we had you covered for every kind of accident."

Acme Insurance - "He can never get anyone to play with him."

"As a manufacturer you're involved in a GLOBAL business and you need to cover yourself against all potential claims. . ."

'The workplace accident rider won't kick in within the next 30 seconds.'

"Honey, I know that you're a great salesman and that you love your job, but I just want to go to the hairdressers. I don't really need travel insurance."

Yeah, your rates are very good, but your ads on TV just aren't funny enough

'I need to buy nine life insurance policies.'

'Okay,but should you change your mind sir, here's my card.' Farbuckle House Fire Insurance

Junior Doctor and Junior Insurance Salesman

"Sounds like someone should have talked to the Three Little Pigs about homeowner's insurance."

"On an essay on careers he wrote that he thought it would be exciting to sell insurance."

"How can it be an 'Act of God'? Your policy states you're an atheist."

'10 out of 10 for perseverance, but who needs a policy up here?'

"He wins every year -- the man could sell an annuity to a mayfly."

"I need life insurance. Period of validity at least 790 years."

"The umbrella policy covers everything you own that can be covered by this umbrella."

"What were you doing talking to our insurance agent today?"

'Just stick to the script, Ravi...'

'I'ts good we don't have to make a living up here. I sold life insurance.'

'Is this a good time to talk about health insurance?'

I didn't mind the two hour video of their holiday, but not all those commercials sandwiched in about his insurance company.

'Do you really think the possibility you may have won 10 million dollars in some sweepstakes is the best life insurance you should have?'

P.R and marketing on the cheap for insurance salesman.

The Evolution of Insurance

COMPAGNIE D'ASSURANCE DE PARIS, 'I can't believe you sold an insurance policy to NOSTRADAMUS!'

'They're out there...ranchers, cowboys soda jerks, insurance salesmen...just waiting for our fire to die down.'

...I just rang to see how your retirement is coming along and to sell you our senior citizens' cover plan

'Give my husband a book and I don't know I've got one!'