Insurance Policy Collector Pillows

"Don't worry. Insurance should cover it."

"I want to climb up mountains without a rope, jump down waterfalls and run through a swamp barefooted to film crocodiles. That's why I need travel insurance - I'm a scaredy-cat."

Critical Illness

'That takes care of health, life, homeowner's, and car -- now, how about some alien abduction insurance?'

'This doesn't bother us at all. We have no-fault experiment insurance.'

'Instead of hunting tonight, lets call our insurance agent, say we want to add optometry coverage, and eat him when he arrives?'

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"Whaddya want for nineteen mil?"

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'Oh great, now I have to render unto Caesar, too.'

"About your tax refund—would you like to donate it to help pay off the national debt?"

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

'This is your lucky day!'

'Syllogisms won't do you any good here, Mr Aristotle.'

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"If you can't take it with you, this must be Hell."

"I wonder what this was for."

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

Economic Prosperity

"Trust me, darling. It was only a bumper car ride. I promise, it won't affect your no claims bonus."

'Sorry. Your accident insurance doesn't cover that kind of incident.'

"Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing!"

'Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing.'

"It's the government, they've spent all our taxes and want to know if we can send them some more."

"Brrr - it was so cold today I had my hands in my own pockets instead of someone elses!"

'He's testing my Hippocratic Oath. He wors for the IRS.'