Insurance Broker T-Shirts

'It's all here in teh fine print. You're not covered against huffing and puffing.'

'Let's see... Ah! Here it is: 'Your policy does not cover floods,earthquakes or axe of god.' Sorry about that, Mr. Finkleman.'

"I need travel insurance...starting yesterday!"

"No, but I can tell you the meaning of whole or term life insurance."

Insurance agents in Heaven.

'All this health insurance stuff is literally making me ill! I'm just sick about it all!'

'Hey, do you sell flood insurance?'

"Any accidents in the last 5 years?"

Insurance Broker - "Mrs Dumpty,there's nothing in the policy about walls."

'I couldn't afford the Bronze, Silver, or Gold health plan of the Affordable Health Care Act...'

'Everything looks good, Now, we'll just bring in the company psychic to see if you have any pre-existing conditions from a previous life.'

"So that's All for One and One for All, except our health insurance, which is Every Man for Himself."

Risk Management Corp

'You must realize that with your expected expiration date, your premiums are going to be astronomical.'

"I'm looking for something as safe as a biscuit barrel."

False Insurance Claims

'Who has the best insurance?'

"We'll keep you poor throughout your life, but at least you'll be rich after you die."

"Fortunately, you have the life savings of a man three times your age."

Broken pipes.

'Oh no! Here comes our insurance guy! He's 3 minutes early for our appointment.'

Auto parts, Lite Puff Pastries, & Health Insurance Exchange.

'I need to buy nine life insurance policies.'

'I'm sorry, but your husband's life insurance policy only covered his eighth life.'

"We've won the takeover battle with Century Insurance..."

'The computer links me to other doctors, so I can see how much they're charging for tests.'

'I don't need your love. I need a 401 (k) and health insurance.'

Mortgage,insurance,and pension holding you back.

Health care/wealth care.

Waiter - 'You can get personal insurance with the fish.'

What say we don't put a claim in on this one. He barely grazed me.

'Can we broker a deal?'

Actuarial Tables of the Gods

If you want full cover for your cat I suggest you take out the nine lives policy.

'Honestly, all I'm looking for is a job with a better health insurance plan.'