Infomercial Fanatic Pillows

'Act now and you'll get this slicerdicer absolutely free! But wait, that's not all...'

"My technique for convincing mom of anything is based entirely on infomercials."

'Stop watching all those rags to riches infomercials. You've caught the investment bug.'

'Don't you have anything better to do than watch super wonder bra infomercials?'

"Baldo, it's 2 in the morning...and you're watching an informercial on a belt that melts away flab? Please...go to bed."

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

'For heaven's sake, Lois, when are you going to give up this mad dieting of yours?' (woman falls through drain).

"I got an 'A' - and all my research was from infomercials."

"I'm used to falling asleep with the TV on. Read me an infomercial."

Astrological forecasts of the rich and famous

"Baby, with your money and my money, we could really buy places."

"I'm afraid it's two, three months, tops, before you're all pants."

"I'm Bobby. If you like the lemonade, perhaps you'd like to invest in the 'Jimmy's Lemonade' franchise, listed in NASDAQ..."

"I got it in the sales."

Ok, I'll put in the hundred thousand for a 50% share of your St. George franchise.

'Good to know my whole social life hasn't been a complete waste.'

'Here's your lemonade and here's some descriptive literature about my franchising opportunities.'

Choosing What To Wear.

'He wears a necktie like he means it.'

'Our Monday night '90-off wine night' isn't exactly working wonders for Tuesday thru Saturday.'

So it's a short back and sides, but leave the horns!

'Now that's what I call a beautiful fit.'

"I like what you've done with your apartment and your clothes."

"I didn't realise it was a formal do."

And if it's successful, we'll do an infomercial.

Shopping Torture

Too Much?

100% Bombast-Filled Parka

"I want you to meet these guys-they've got the hottest new stupid thing on the Internet."

Movie Franchise

"I don't know...to me it seems like a cry for help."

The trouble was she never knew where to draw the line

Shoe Whore

"But wait, there's more."

'Does it come with American citizenship?'