Infant Influencer Pillows

"We've decided that it will be better for his later development if we speak to him only in legalese."

Happy Tots Day Care.

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

'For those with books, open and follow along. For those with laptops, follow me on Twitter.'

"I don't post selfies because I don't want people to feel better or worse about their looks."

A is for App...B is for Blogger...C is for Celebrity.

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

Baby rocks!

"Where have you been? This content's not going to create itself."

'And the wicked stepmother looked into her smartphone and said, "Selfie, selfie in my face, who's the fairest in this place?"

From Hunter-Gatherer to Influencer: The Evolution of the Dignity of Labor

"We're not really fighting, mom. We just need a little drama for our YouTube channel. Subscribers equal money."

"Mommy, watch, I'm living authentically!"

"I'm spending more time promoting myself than I am being myself."

Bill hits the ground running, makes a big splash early on, and rides a roller-coaster of insane popularity right into the "Where Are They Now?" Wilderness of Forgotten Celebrities.

Witches of Instagram

"It's time we discuss menopause and climax change."

"That's right, it's @kingphilbert3rd... Yeah, with a P-H... That's him, yep, now tap "follow"..."

"This is off our first TikTok."

'Your tweets have quite a following.'

Businessman with briefcase pushes stroller with baby and its briefcase.

Creativity 2.0

"He has the tweeting skills of a man twice his age."

"Remember when we were Instagram models?"

"I already have the perfect hashtag!"

'We're an international company, Mr. Zickenbarth. We've got creditors in more than 200 different countries!'

Paranoia vs Social Currency.

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

'How do I get people to visit my...'

"Can you take a video of me attacking the garbage so I can post it on Instagram?"

From Hunter-Gatherer to Influencer: The Evolution of the Dignity of Labor

"My assistant is more of a behind-the-scenes kind of guy."

"I'd like to get my withdrawal in either cryptocurrency or social-media exposure."

"He's the one family member who doesn't care if I post hundreds of photos of him online."