Industrial Satirist Pillows

A businessman sits with an executive toy of smokestacks.

"I'll breathe easier when the economy gets back on track."

Coal Liquidifcation Plant/Oil Solidification Plant.

"We must have had an order."

'The check is in the email attachment.'

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"Oh, yes, and there's plenty of opportunity for advancement."

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

Boss's Desk Says No!

'Shhhh. Fido inherited seventy percent of this company.'

"This report is mumbo jumbo...I asked for gobbledeeegook!"

"Welcome aboard, Bailey. Don't worry — they don't bite."

Royal Mail boss to become ITV boss.

'This country is on the road to ruin.' - 'Well, it'll never get there in this traffic.'

'We're here to carbon date your company's carbon footprint.'

"You're just the man we're looking for. Come around to this side of the desk, and I'll gather up my things and get the heck out of here."

"These are the principal qualities we're looking for in our new recruits."

"There are no big jobs, only small machines."

'You really want that promotion, don't you, Sherman?'

"We're pleased to announce that your company has shrewdly traded a cow for some magic beans." some ma

'Being offshored isn't exactly what I expected.'

'Let's just wait here until the federal stimulus returns.'

Born In Captivity.

Another day at work would be one too many...

"Brilliant report, I can't tell where the facts and the fiction begins"

'The shareholders have voted you off the board. We don't feel you're tough enough. On the bright side, you've won this year's Miss Congeniality award.'

"Would anyone like to question my downsizing proposal?"

'Do you want to tell them their department is being downsized again, or should I?'

"Imagine if only 1/2 the companies that claimed to have a great culture actually did."

Parade of Businessmen

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

"The more coffee I drink, the more these motivational posters make sense."