Industrial Chic Decorator T-Shirts

"Potential buyers of the company are coming through today. Tell everyone to look sharp and put a few bowls of potpourri here and there."

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

"Except for that wall socket, the whole damn thing is a trompe-l'oeil."

Idle parts

'When she walks in she lights up the room...' 'It's living next to the nuclear plant.'

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

'How are you doing on your side?'

A new meaning in the Roman

Futons/Futoffs

'Oh, hi Tom... I'm just putting some personal touch to my office.'

"Just imagine this room fully carpeted with multi-level platforms and cubbies."

Florist delivers Cactus to Man on Bed of Nails

"You idiot! It's all bare walls and Ikea these days."

'I liked the Pompidou Center too, Melvin, but I'm not obsessed with it.'

Wallpaper Bouguet

"Stop complaining, granite is in."

'On this site will be erected a beautiful new twelve story drilling platform that will pump 10,000 barrels of oil a day.'

Negotiations over the new colour scheme had reached stalemate.

"Well, it does make the room look larger."

Carlo Bing's Penne Lounge Chair

'I hired a decorator.'

Smiley

'I just love what you've done with the kitty litter box.'

"The one's an en suite and the other's a walk-in wardrobe."

Prisoner decorating his cell.

'It was designed for people who don't want any visitors.'

'Sheila wanted a statue and I wanted a water feature so we compromised.'

"Gosh, Bob, I just LOVE the dynamic interplay between the new wall color and the accents of pandemic-era psychosis!"

Xmas tree

Henry Ford sculptures

"Damn - we'll have to hire a new one!"

Steel fabricator

'No one moves me quite the way you move me Kevin.'