Industrial Chic Decorator Pillows

"Potential buyers of the company are coming through today. Tell everyone to look sharp and put a few bowls of potpourri here and there."

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

"The woman on the fire escape who acted like it was a balcony"

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

"Except for that wall socket, the whole damn thing is a trompe-l'oeil."

Idle parts

'When she walks in she lights up the room...' 'It's living next to the nuclear plant.'

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

Crap others threw out

'How are you doing on your side?'

Futons/Futoffs

A new meaning in the Roman

Florist delivers Cactus to Man on Bed of Nails

"You idiot! It's all bare walls and Ikea these days."

"Stop complaining, granite is in."

Wallpaper Bouguet

"Just imagine this room fully carpeted with multi-level platforms and cubbies."

'Oh, hi Tom... I'm just putting some personal touch to my office.'

'I liked the Pompidou Center too, Melvin, but I'm not obsessed with it.'

'On this site will be erected a beautiful new twelve story drilling platform that will pump 10,000 barrels of oil a day.'

Negotiations over the new colour scheme had reached stalemate.

"Well, it does make the room look larger."

Smiley

Prisoner decorating his cell.

"The one's an en suite and the other's a walk-in wardrobe."

'I just love what you've done with the kitty litter box.'

'I hired a decorator.'

Carlo Bing's Penne Lounge Chair

'It was designed for people who don't want any visitors.'

"Gosh, Bob, I just LOVE the dynamic interplay between the new wall color and the accents of pandemic-era psychosis!"

Xmas tree

Henry Ford sculptures

Steel fabricator

'Sheila wanted a statue and I wanted a water feature so we compromised.'

"Damn - we'll have to hire a new one!"