Indie Film Advocate Gifts

"I will never read that book, and I'm eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"I'll have a cup of coffee, and would you mind removing that ridiculous painting and turning off the Wilco?"

"I'm glad they want comedy... the budget is a joke."

"Ronny, there's not going to be any 3-D. The studio wants you to shoot it on your cell phone."

"I have always depended on the content of strangers."

"They say she's gone completely Sundance."

'You're just not right for Naked Ninja Nuns...you can act!'

Duplass Brothers

"You're going out there an annoying, mannered girl, but you're going to come back an indie queen."

Tenafly International Film Festival

"'Superman legacy' was awful. Just awful!"

This program is made possible by donations from Don and Mary Doughaberg, and from lowlifes like you who never get their names mentioned.

"So many indie films, so little time."

Sandwich Shop Sandiwched Between Skyscrapers

"It's a niche movie. Then there's a car chase, and – bam – mass market."

"Tiffany tells me you were at Sundance."

"Now now Mrs Butterworth, you were warned that there were going to be cuts to the arts and crafts budget."

"How's this for an idea — the first hundred-million-dollar independent film!"

Movies made for under eight million dollars.

Goldilocks at Sundance.

Homeless man's sign: 'Will sell book & movie rights to the story of my downfall for a cool million.'

Broom Operators Deserve Better

FREElance Artists

Small store loses out to glossy big store

'Wow! That's probably the best Kyrgyzstani neo-realist horror-comedy crossover I've seen so far this year.'

'D'you have anything that's not in 3D, a sequel or bloody kids?'

"I'm thinking of stopping a podcast."

'Artistic it might have been, but those sort of films ought to be banned!'

"The new Matter-Eater Lad movie is going to be better than the new Avengers movie because it's not about saving the whole world." "Yeah. People are tired of blockbusters where the fate of the whole world is at stake. That's why 'The Martian' did so well." "It was only about the fate of Matt Damon and his potato garden." "I want to see a movie where aliens try to conquer Venus and nobody cares." "We really should have our own movie review show."