Impact Calculator T-Shirts

Asteroid Trajectory Assessment.

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

Pity vs. Bragging and Public Relations

No caption (A crash test dummy in the shape of a bird flies toward a window. Other birds dressed as scientists study the experiment from the ground).

Pandora's boxes

Oil Spill in the Gulf of Mexico

"At the moment I'm torn between the emotionally rewarding but poorly resourced role of a social worker or a more intellectualy rigorous career in quantum physics."

"It's right here… Nov. 29th, 1981, at Elaine's… twelve percent."

'Apparently it's not enough to say that 'lots of people think we do a jolly good job' anymore.'

"And make sure you give me a paper straw... gotta do my bit for the planet."

Is online shopping bad for the environment?

"If you want folks to see you're serious about carbon off-setting, plant it round the front - this is where our helipad is going!"

'Self service.' 'How much do I tip myself?'

The Achiever: competing with the appearance of virtue

"Will people ever say of me - he made his mark?"

"How would you describe your attitude to risk?"

"Our clients like their accountants to use their 'imagination', but most would still prefer their returns in a spreadsheet."

"Your father suffers from 'Notip Arthritis'. It's characterized by a stiffening of the waitress."

'Whoa! Our waiter's online and you should see what he's saying about your tip!'

'What happens if I die young?'

Half of those who made no donations last year 'do not trust charities'.

"I'm a do-gooder, Maggie. It's not easy."

"We actually just need your local actor inputs here."

'Entering Krentville -Dystopia of the northeast'

Caution: Generous Gratuity Expected

Corona or Hunger

Gas prices.

"Bob, if you get out of there, I could fit one more in."

'Can we recess for the day? I have to renew my liability coverage.'

Prices Plummet

Woman throwing paints out of her house.

"Wait! That's not a decimal point! It's a dead fly!"

I believe everything happens for a reason...

'It's a plaster-cast of my carbon footprint.'

'Social work is such a worthwhile, fulfilling career that I've decided to give up my fabulous income as an investment banker to become one!'