Illustrated Humor Collector Pillows

'Talk about inconsiderate! You could have permanently damaged the bike!'

Hollywood Sign Developers

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

A Q&A with President Obama over jobs

To no ones surprise, they ran head-on into one another. (All couples are wearing teachers reading 'I'm with Stupid'.)

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

'Bert's dog training.'

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

'RUN FOR COVER!!!!! It's another one of those 'Baby Showers'!!!

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

Cake Free Zone

"Eat me"

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

"Whoa. Someone needs their diaper changed."

"Do we have to go to the beach? I think the airline mixed up my luggage."

'The bad news is you're going to marry a geek, and not a pro athlete. The good news is the geek owns the team.'

Apple Pie Abduction

A 'Falling Rock' and a 'Deer Crossing' zone.

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

'I've just discovered that one of my ancestors was a Security Goose for the Roman Army...'

Man falls in water Title: 'Willis was always an overachiever.'

Easter Island Shades...

"They retired me. Just like that. Seems I'm no good over 55 mph anymore." "How does that make you feel?" "Like I want to bash my head against a wall!"

A watch face with Stonehenge

The Tale of the Tape of the Tail.

"Fantastic! Do you realize what we've just stumbled upon? It's the fabled Lost Glove Compartment of the Ancient Astronauts!"

You can fool some of the people all of the time - "Send in some of the people, Dorothy."

Whatís that, boy? Youíre too tired for a walk and you just want to watch TV?

"Behold! My greatest improvement to fatherhood. She cooks, cleans, takes care of the kids, burps, and farts. What's more...she self-identifies as a father!"

Bathroom Fairy

Vanna White: The Later Years.

Clown to clown on unicycle: 'How does it corner?'

'You've got the wrong idiot, number.'