Identity Ponderer Pillows

'Humphries from accounts seemed so familiar.'

"The beauty of it is that, if you ever look like losing the battle of the sexes, you can switch to the other side."

As Lucanus, a giant bug, awoke one morning from uneasy dreams, he found himself transformed into Franz Kafka.

Retro-temoral Mailing Lists.

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

A Punk Rocker Cocoon.

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

"If you could be any Bob Dylan you wanted to, which Bob Dylan would you be?"

"It's not face paint. I'm transitioning into a snow leopard."

"So you kiss me and I turn into a prince? No thanks, sweetie, I'm gay. I'm already a queen."

"I'm an oldest child trapped in the body of a middle child."

Bob began seeing his mother, who gave him up for adoption, professionally, three times a week. It didn't help much.

"I just don't want to be 'that' waffle."

"I feel like there's a chick in me trying to escape."

"When Harold first said he identified as a balloon animal I thought it was just a phase, but here we are fifteen years later and it seems to be working."

"Tell me more about your imposter syndrome."

'What do lawyers really want, Mr. Montague?'

"With this suit, I hereby establish dominion over my male identity."

Guys looks in the mirror and sees himself as a prisoner.

"I'm not worried about identity theft. Who'd want to be me?"

'Leap frog? No thanks- I'm a toad.'

"I'm tired of being openly gay.I'm seriously considering going back in to the closet."

'Hey, it's that peeping Tom again, the one who has no respect for privacy.'

'This is the age of specialisation - you can't be a hunter AND a gatherer.'

'Just one God? - But won't he be outnumbered?'

Psychiatry ward with 'Inhibited' and 'Outgoing' trays.

'What did He do before he was God?'

Columbus discovers ... his feminine side.

"Mom, Dad, college changed me."

"Actually, Sally, my name isn't Mrs. Santa Claus... It's Barb. I'm not defined by my husband."

Jesus wept

“This daily metamorphosis never fails to amaze me. Around the house, I’m a perfect idiot. I come to court, futon a black robe, and, by God, I’m it!”