Hypothetical Scenarios T-Shirts

Worry tank

"But, for ten million bucks, would you lick it?"

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

"Honestly, I didn't know your wife was in the shower."

'Can I call you back, Frank? A giant maggot is eating my desk, people are shooting at me and my hair is on fire.'

"What the hell happened to this town?"

"Oh no, not another pandemic!"

"I always wondered who got my transplant."

'Did anyone hand in a mature stilton last week?'

"It's kittens."

'Ordinarily I wouldn't do anything like that, Mr. Hubbard, but I just hit $2 million in the lottery!'

Spiderman car window cleaner

Office of Strategic Scenarios: 'Best case...Worst case.'

"Randy, if you were stranded on an island, what's the one book you'd want to have along with you?" "Easy: Blood Meridian by Cormac McCarthy. It's got the perfect heft to knock coconuts out of trees." "Well, I'd like to have How to Get Off an Island, by Archie Macguyver." "That title's actually a metaphor for overcoming shyness." "We really should have our own book review show."

Kate's Cat Kennel

"When he was yelling stroke, stroke, stroke...I just thought he was counting!"

A shark swims into a desert island.

Ah ha! Surgeons remove shopping trolley from patient.

Blindman's blind guide dog with its own guide animal

"Lasagna anyone?"

'Well I'd love to stay and chat, but this is one of those 'get things done' days.'

'I'm not criticizing your picks, Gary, I'm just saying maybe they're not the first thing I would have grabbed.'

Mosquito feeding from a blood transfusion bag.

Apex Piano Movers

'But will you still respect me in the morning?'

"He looks so peaceful sleeping there, I don't have the heart to wake him. Let's just demolish the building."

'I'm sick of this island, Bob! I'm sick of you! If we don't get rescued soon, I'm going to go INSANE!'

Dream Zoom

"That's an unusual, orange jumpsuit!"

"Sharks! Hundreds of 'em! Flying sharks! Everyone out of the water! They're converging on the future!"

'I don't think I could ever get that hungry.'

Thieves searching for money down the back of the sofa.

"And I'm not requesting a pay rise, I'm DEMANDING a pay rise..."

'And now time for operation: Hit golf balls into windows!'