Hymn Hummer T-Shirts

"What d'you say we try sneaking out before the last one?"

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

"Whose idea was it to start with the Hallelujah chorus?"

Priest

"As a member of the Sunday praise team you are not allowed to "change it up", whenever you feel led."

"If we could all turn to page 387, turn off your iPods and repeat after me?"

Religious Maintenance: 24 Hr Callout.

'Ta dum deedee dum -- DUM -- Bloop -- Fsst, tra la,,,'

"If she has the voice of an angel I sure hope the others drown her out."

Eurovision Hymn Contest

"You asked to see me, boss?" "Yes, Rudy. We have a serious problem here." "I'm going to need you to stop humming the 'Star Wars' theme 24/7." "Disney is notoriously litigious. If they catch wind that you're publicly performing the theme, they may sue the cafe for royalties." "Daaaa... daaaa... duh-duh-duh daaaaaaa... daaaa... duh-duh-duh... wait, what?" "If you cost me my livelihood, I'll do to you what Han did to that Tauntaun."

"First period music always leaves me with a tune stuck in my head for the rest of the day."

Thomas Dorsey.

The minister's a sub, so we're all going to sing the wrong hymn, pass it on …

"Hmm Hmm. Hmm Hmm."

"I can't get the Grease soundtrack out of my head."

'For you information, hymns are meant to be sung, not whistled.'

'As you close your eyes and relax...' - '...allow your body and mind to attune with the universal consciousness...Just hum.'

Okay

"In the absence of a piano....."

'Doesn't this jukebox play anything but hymns?'

'We thought it fit his rather plaintive personality.'

Your new hymn seems to be about your sports car and guitar! Yes, it's my take on 'All Things Bright and Beautiful'.

'What number is the hymn 'All things bright and beautiful'?'

'According to my records, you never went to church and hardly ever watched 'Songs of Praise'.'

"Everyone has to do their fair share. . . You have always been known as a good worker. . . You want to give something back, don't you? . . ."

"Hi honey, how'd the mammogram go?"

"Is it legal for 'Bringing in the Sheaves' to be the on hold music at the Department of Agriculture?"

"Trying to explain the difference between praise and worship."

Nail and Hammer

"Okay, who's singing 'How great thou Arrrrrrrrt?"

When Ernie gets a song stuck in his head, he doesn't have room for anything else.