Humorous Overthinker Pillows

"The cat's sleeping." "She's so comfy." "If I move I'll wake her up." "The phone is ringing... They'll call back later." "I'm hungry... But it'll pass." "Just gotta wait 'till she wakes up."

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

"It's days like this that make me long for days like this."

"You are being overly-defensive again, Brenda!"

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"The overthinker"

That party went well.

"Isn't it an amazing co-incidence that this is an orange, and it IS ORANGE?"

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Admit it, we're lost."

No Immediate Danger

"Of course it's not clean energy -- We don't have clean ANYTHING!"

Medieval Vacation: 'What? I am relaxed. I'm relaxing!'

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

"I got all 'Cs', but I call that an 'A' report card...'A' for 'Average.'"

'I wasted a lot of time in graduate school to get this job.'

A Hypochondriac's Worst Nightmare

"Perhaps there is such a thing as being too well-informed."

"Ever wondered about the development of mankind if, just before the big bang, a voice said 'Oops!'"

"Very impressive resume, however you didn't explain why you were tagged and released from your last job."

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"

You have reached the end of your brain...

"I don't think of it as copying from Danny's paper ... I think of it as utilizing the Freedom of Information Act."

"Now then Mr Parker - are you relaxed?"

"I made a list of all my symptoms. Lost the list. Can't remember any of my symptoms now."

"I hope someday someone steals my identity and makes something out of my life."

Site of new Super Gamblers Anonymous.

'You say you're having trouble seeing into the future'

"I belong to that heroic little band of unemployed on whom a healthy economy depends."

"I hacked into Santa's computer and discovered we're not on his naughty list. I feel we're letting our generation down."

"Oh, can't complain, but I do."

"I suppose we could burst onto the literary scene."