Humorous Competition Lover Gifts

'Every year we have a contest with the neighbors to see who has the last needle left on their tree.'

Golden Village: Lawn Mowing Races

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

Tension filled the tent.

"I hope I get rock and you get scissors, or I get scissors and you get paper, or I get paper and you get rock."

'Upgrades? Yes, we've programmed it to excrete a few drops of water if it should lose a chess match. You know - tears.'

'He's been hiding out here for 20 years. Apparently, his buddies forgot to tell him the paintball tournament was over.'

The Unsportables: Relay

Al's Diner. Special: Spaghetti. All You Can Eat $3.95. Ernie, don't play with your food unless you're sure you can win.

"My favorite tea: hot daffodil-infused chamomile with a hint of whiskey. Are you serious? Of course I'm serious! I've been dosing myself with small quantities of poisonous daffodil ever since 1931. You have to build up an immunity if you want to survive in the cutthroat world of Scrabble tournaments."

Danth battle?

Noughts and crosses hugging and kissing.

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

The Cricketer and the Golfer

"Looks like somebody brought a blanky to a pillow fight."

Workplace Shinanigans

Office Competitions

'What a control freak!'

"I quit."

A report on one-upmanship in TV newscasts.

Hat Wars.

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

I think it's time to retire from boxing. I'm too old for life in the fist lane.

'There goes Finley...turning pro.'

Rugby Mad.

'It's just possible that the best candidate is the one who wins the Spoon Race.'

A powerful tennis serve loosens the strings of a tennis racquet.

"Rate your experience and you could win an Amazon gift voucher."

'I won a prize for being the school swot. I killed more flies than anyone else.'

'This is doing your chances of winning the 'Golden Paper Clip' award no harm at all!'

"I don't get it. If he's no faster than me, how come he always beats me?"

'Congratulations. You're our 15th caller. The grant is yours!'

Basketball Players Working Together

'My competitor down the street sasses his parents.'