Humorist Horticulturist T-Shirts

Garden Shop: Pig $#!@ and Sheep $#!@

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

'I had a wonderful garden last year. Bark beetles, aphids, mealy worms, thripes, wax seal, gray mold, and grubs!'

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

'Ugh Look The whole garden is just one giant cat toilet'

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Excellent crop! What's your secret?

"When will somebody cut the grass?"

Flamingo on a bird table feeding from a shrimp container.

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

"What are you in for?"

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

'That GMO gene salesman was darn right!'

'So much for talking to plants. I distinctly heard it tell me to shut up!'

'These spare Christmas decorations make perfect bird scarers.'

'Um. . . I don't think that's a candy bar.'

"I was hoping Calvin would grow up to be top sirloin..."

"I guess it must be that new growth hormone the farmer gave me!"

Bonsai Exhibit

"Weeds are like kids. They grow up so fast."

Modern Witch Shoppe

The Last Days of a Hydrangea

Little Farm Shop of Horrors with G.M produce turned into man eating plant

Annual flower having a mid-life crisis in July

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

The beautiful but deadly 'Venus dog trap'.

Executive grows martinis in his garden.

'I finnaly located what was causing that hissing sound on the tractor.'

Man is injured transporting cacti.

Bird baths with two different kinds of water - sparkling and still.

Bird feeder being used by vultures.

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'