Housing Law Pillows

'Your tenancy deposit will be held and protected securely in accordance with an authorised statutory scheme which is supervised by Big Larry, here ...'

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

'Not a word to Alfred, but the spare bedroom is worth losing the fourteen pounds!'

'And this is Eddy, he's been giving virtual tours long before computers.'

'I remember when all this was fields.'

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"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

"The last time I was in Europe was 4 boyfriends ago..."

'Wait a second, Dad...did the three little pigs have a home owner's policy to cover huffing and puffing?'

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

"And what do you think of the government's record on housing?"

"Privare equity bought the dam and jacked up rent. Nests are next."

"When we said we'd build 'affordable' homes we had a particular buyer in mind."

"I see no problems. We can get lots more of these houses in.."

'I'm sorry, but there's nothing in the zoning regulations covering bad taste.'

A house being demolished in order to make way for a road widening scheme, with the occupants being evicted.

"The government prefers to see it as a flexible, environmentally friendly building option that fits within our current funding projections."

Homeless count.

"And then the three bears were slowly forced out of the neighborhood due to major corporations cornering the market—The once cozy cottage is now an Air B&B." "The end."

"And these are the Andersons, our tenants."

Early House Hunting.

House hunting is cruel.

"If the nanny state wants us to solve the housing crisis they need to get out of the way and let us learn from the leaders in the field..."

"Oh dear! Low-cost housing."

'We're looking for a place with no high walls.'

'Can I assume from the rent that this place comes with its own butler?'

Affordable housing - Mum and Dads.

"The only thing we seem to have in your price range is a bird box in Billericay."