Houseplants Gifts

'Did you feed the new plant, Frank?...Frank?'

'Maybe you're telling them more than they can assimilate.'

The Houseplant Cemetery.

'Then it's agreed. You give sun, water and carbon dioxide and in return, you get oxygen.'

'I think we have a possible case of death by overdose.'

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

"You're not supposed to answer her when she talks to us."

"It's an orchid."

'Honey, have you watered the philodendron lately?'

"What is it about us that makes only crazy people want to talk to us?"

'The reason you're hyperactive is that there's just too much oxygen in the room.'

I think you're watering it too much.

"It's time to split the Hosta funkia!"

"I'd better bring in my plants."

"I'm glad I decided on the drought-tolerant plants."

'Well he doesn't get it from my side of the family.'

'I think you've talked it to death, dear.'

"You don't need to water the plants. I saw the cat doing that already."

And incorrect feeding can affect them adversely.

Cactus owner with a spiky beard.

Escaping Flowers

"I find that so rude - the Venus flytrap eating when I'm talking to it."

'Say when.'

'My husband watered it with beer.'

"It's my week to be responsible for the class plant."

"Don't overfeed it!"

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

"Here's the new smart plant...it tells you when you're overwatering it."

"You can tell when people don't have pets, because they start to look like their plants."

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

"I thought you said it wouldn't need much attention."

"Oops! There goes another rubber-tree plant!"

"May I remind you that our prenuptial agreement called for me to take the plants?"

In the houseplant cemetery.

"My Chilean monkey flower is just sitting there doing nothing."