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Open house.

"I'm going to look for a mortgage...I may be some time!"

Rising Housing Costs vs Wages.

Very steep climb: 'I thought this house sounded cheap.'

"He's considered a fixture, so he's included with the house."

"One BHK, two baths, and sixty three plug points."

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'

"The only thing we seem to have in your price range is a bird box in Billericay."

'We've both got jobs with the local authority and we need to buy somewhere soon.'

'TA-DAAAAA!!'

'Don't you have anything in my price range?' - 'There is one. But if I sold it to you, I'd have one homeless watchdog on my hands.'

Land Sale

"You won't have trouble with bad neighbours. I WAS the bad neighbour."

For sale

How often do the planes fly overhead..?

"These older properties can be deceptively spacious."

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

"Liable to flooding? Whatever gives you that idea sir?"

The Tightrope Balancing Act of Home Ownership and Interest Rates.

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

'I'm retiring soon and looking for something more comfortable...like a loafer.'

'We'll take it!'

Open House of Horrors

'The roof needs icing.'

"I think we could be very happy here until we aren't."

"A little baking soda will get rid of the smell.

'It's a long and narrow home: A perfect fit for you Mr Eel...'

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

"Today on Escape to the Country Emily & Oliver are looking for that special little property in the Cotswolds. So what exactly's going to tick all their boxes?"

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

Emigrating to France.

"I want to live in a neighborhood where I can walk around at night."

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'