Hotel Hijinks Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Faster! By God, you'll earn that tip yet!"

'I'm your stand in, your Gideon Bible has been stolen'

'He's not a pet. He's an endangered species.'

"This hotel room must be dry. There's a cactus growing out of my suitcase."

Cut out and keep your own Room Service.

"Here’s the thermostat. Like all hotel thermostats, it’s just for show."

'I really felt at home there. The food was awful!'

"Mind if I take a bath first, pet."

'Room service? Please send up some fish oil.'

Graffiti on baseboard.

Room service.

Sparrow Hilton

Harbor Hotel: 'Absolutely NO swashbuckling after 10 PM'.

'I see the Maids have been in!'

"I'd like to leave a wake up call for, . ... OHH ..., April."

'I brought my mini bar with me.'

Bed or breakfast.

"I'm in a shared room?! What kind of hole is this?"

'Hello, Room Service?'

No petting in the pool!

'We only have rooms with real teeth left!'

"Here’s your room key and mini-bar."

Medical Emergencies on Holiday.

happy bellboy carrying suitcases

"Do you have a room for a couple of knights?"

Live Elevator Music 3-7:30.

"I'm so tired I can't think straight. Give me a room that's idiot-proof."

'Ah, you must be the cleaner. I'm the dirtier.'

Chamber Pot - En Suite

"Next time you ask the maid for extra towels, be sure to tip her."

"Apparently our hotel is just a stone's throw from the beach..!"

'I'll take the room for Winter: Please put a 'Do Not Disturb Until Spring' sign on the door...'

But the brochures says breakfast in bed! Yes, only if you carry your bed down to the dining room!

'Service Lift.'

'Oh, those are just for show. We don't have electricity.'