Hotel Escape Artist T-Shirts

Paterfamilias makes himself independent of hotels

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

"Ooooh, I bet that feels nice."

"Me, as soon as I'm old enough, I'm out of here! I'll go and join my older brother: he's a beach bum in San Diego, California..."

"My husband is taking me on a cruise, so I’m looking for a book that will help me forget that I’m on a cruise with my husband."

'We'd just like to get away from all leading economic indicators for a while.'

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

'What do you mean, you're tired of the rat race?'

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

"This is our most difficult escape room. In here, you're a mother of 4 unruly children, tons of overdue bills and a lazy husband."

"You had the power to leave all along - just click your heels three times, grab your coat, and sneak out without saying goodbye."

'The the President we've gone surfin', surfin' U,S,A,'

An alleyway leads to a scenic area.

'This chart shows how much time we waste every day looking at charts.'

"These meetings bring out my creative side. How's this for the boss?"

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

Nesting dolls stranded on an island send out nesting bottles with messages in each of them.

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

"Always carry a ball with you! If you are chased by a dog, stop, show the ball and throw it. Believe me, he won't be able to resist chasing it instead of you..."

"Sorry, I'm preaching again. Why don't we pause for a moment while I pass around the collection plate."

'I grew sick of Madison Avenue,so I quit,bought the bar and never looked back.'

The ride with the shortest lines at disneyworld...

'I hear they're letting you go. Your family must have paid the ransom.'

"Sorry I'm late. Traffic was fine. I just don't like any of you and don't want to be here."

Tweaking the CV.

'Miss Fenwick - I don't want to see anyone today!'

"That's you nomad's answer to everything...ROAD TRIP!"

Stress

Ostrich's head buried into a pile of sand containing a woman

Desert Island Fantasies

Crib Escape

Undignified Exits of the Planet World: Geronimo!

"It's safe to close your eyes and relax...these meetings are safety equipped with front and side airbags."