Hospital Tales Lover Pillows

'Death doesn't frighten me, but the night nurse does...'

'The test results are in and I just lost a $300 bet with the coroner.'

Providing Healthcare For All

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

"Ugh, we get it - you're in love."

'I'd like a second opinion, doctor.'

"Since he was born today he won't begin daycare until tomorrow."

"Please, doc, pull the plug. Not on me...on the TV!"

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

'If it don't hurt, don't mess with it!'

'Urology...can you hold?'

"What is it Doc, I can handle it."

"The doctor will now glance in passing at you."

'I thought I told you to cut down on sugar.'

'You're excused. Anyone else feel too squeamish to witness the procedure?'

Paramedics.

Hospital porter leaving brain behind

'I'm so proud of you sweetie, you haven't smoked for a week!'

'When you said I had to come in for a scan, this isn't what I had in mind.'

'We've decided it might be better to show your televised operation after the 9 o'clock watershed...'

'Don't get any ideas, mister -- I recognize that look in your eye!'

"Try and get some rest and in a week or two we'll put your brain back in."

'Before your 'routine' surgery, your manager would like to stop by and give you a 'routine' exit interview.'

'I'm afraid the bed shortage is rather acute...'

'Maintenance to the O.R....Maintenance to the O.R....'

'I can't turn it off.'

'I've got a good idea! Let's take everything out and start from scratch.'

"I'm confident he'll pull through. The tests show there is plenty of fight left in him."

"Mr. Marshand, wake up – your MRI is over! Mr. Marshand!!"

"Your tests look normal, but that's what the disease wants us to think."

'For god's sake Walters, wait until the patient is fully anesthetized before going through his wallet.'

'We abide by HIPAA laws to protect your privacy.'

'All right, so he dropped the heart. The floor is clean.'

"The mood Disorders Clinic is three floors up, and then two floors down."

Ward Cleaning.