Hospital Haggler Mugs

Man about to pay his hospital bill notices a team of doctors and nurses waiting to resuscitate him.

Donald Came Out Of The Recovery Room This Morning But Had To Go Back After Seeing The Bill.

"Yeah, I know. bu tthe administration didn't want to appear culturally insensitive."

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

'It's not easy being fabulous and caretaking.'

'Yeah, the radiology job market is really hot right now - it's so hot I think I'm getting third degree burns! I gotta go!'

'Never accept the first offer, always hold out for more.'

'Anaesthetic ok?' - 'Yes, ten double scotches from the pub up the road.'

Young costermonger trying to sell to a gentleman.

'Now here's my idea...we come up with a really high-priced drug to treat drug side effects...'

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.

"When they said they were bringing in students I thought they meant MEDICAL students."

Patient to Doctor: 'This may hurt a little.'

"Don't just stand there gawping women! Give me a hand with my monthly salary!"

"The forty thousand dollars includes a rear view mirror!"

"He's refusing to pay the inflationary bits"

"How much if I pedal?"

'Hold it, you can cancel that STAT call.'

'This one was too patient.'

"Tia Carmen! We're at Plaza Mall...not Flaco's Flea Market!"

Surgery / Canteen - The perplexities of priorites.

'These are from my attorneys for malpractice suit.'

"I'll be blunt. You don't have much time. In three days I'm turning this over to a collection agency."

'I'm feeling a lot better, Nurse -- how about switching me to the cheap stuff?'

'Welcome to the Ambulance Chasing Network... Have you or someone you love taken Zerkzes pills in the past six-months?'

"Actually, I forgot to subtract the disinterest."

Practicing Defensive Medicine

"Will he ever be able to produce revenue again?"

'This is my twin brother. He's going to give you the second opinion you asked for...'

'The doctor's busy. Can you come back when you're better?'

Working at a hospital

'We have a tournament to see which drug reps get to see the doctors.'

Angel of Death dangles a carrot on a stick.

'How did your meeting with your insurance company go?'

"Apart from the NDA, we have another option before signing a contract."