Horticulture Hero T-Shirts

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

"Before invasive species, the only things I could grow were weeds and mildew."

User friendly soil.

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

-A garden uses a lot of water. -Most of it perspiration.

'Whenever he stares out the window like that I know he's about to go into a gardening frenzy.'

"The garden is my résumé."

"You could at least look at me when I'm talking to you"

'It's only a slug Norman.'

'I need to relax more.' - 'Plants are relaxing.' - 'I need a bonsai.' - '...and here's your care guide.' - 'Say what?' - 'My, my... you're a demanding little bastard, aren't you?'

The Garden

'They gave thanks for a bountiful harvest? Their garden must've done better than yours.'

Garden Envy.

"It doesn't mean you, Hickford!"

"You give up too easily, dear."

July: Drought in the garden can be a serious problem this month.

Tree Identification Field Guide...

Prize vegetables.

The Busy Gardener

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Gardener attacked by plants.

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

Doing the borders.

Gardener

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

Plants Cheer as They Get Watered.

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

'I had a wonderful garden last year. Bark beetles, aphids, mealy worms, thripes, wax seal, gray mold, and grubs!'